In Hopes of Sleeping Tonight...

I've been thinking about the last couple of Glee episodes a lot lately. To the point of distraction. I've actually lost sleep over this. Obviously, I, like Rachel Berry, care too much.  This show is so powerful, and reaches so many eager viewers, young and old(er) alike.  I worry about those who may be led to make decisions they wouldn't have made otherwise. I get that this is a television show, and firmly believe that parents are ultimately responsible for teaching their children values. But to say that they aren't influenced by the media, and especially by shows like Glee, which is full of likable, relatable characters, is simply untrue.

In the last two episodes, we learned that it's "unrealistic" to ask children to refrain from drinking or from sexual activity.  We also learned that celibacy is "lame" and "naive". From an adult. An educator, no less. Because apparently teenagers are so full of hormones, they simply can't be expected to control themselves. Evidently, the only reasons a kid would choose to be celibate are a) she doesn't understand the mechanics of sex or b) she can't find anyone to do the deed with. I'm baffled that a show that advocates inclusion and open-mindedness is so quick to ridicule kids who make choices outside of what's supposedly "normal". I am a parent and have worked with teenagers in many capacities. I know they are impulsive and hormonal. I'm all for education, but at the end of the day, telling a kid that he should just give in and do whatever he feels like doing is irresponsible. That's how Lindsay and Miley were built. Surrendering to every impulse doesn't make a person enlightened. It makes him an animal. An enlightened person educates himself and then makes informed, rational decisions. Yeah, kids struggle with that concept, because they are still developing both physically and psychologically. My point is that they need to learn. I'm not trying to sound preachy here. I get that all this was supposed to be funny and ridiculous. But it mostly made me sad. There were those few promising moments between Burt and Kurt, but nowhere near enough to counteract the "Holly Effect".

I would also like to say a few (!) words about the Santana/Brittany situation. I don't understand why this is happening at all, other than there were a bunch of screaming fans at Comic Con who thought it was a swell idea. So, this is now the third sexual identity crisis the show has highlighted. This season.  I'm not even including Kurt, or whatever it is that Brittany is experiencing. Not only that, but Santana's situation essentially mirrors Karofsky's: "I'm a bully who insults people and pushes everyone around because I'm scared and have feelings I don't know how to deal with." Am I seriously the only person who notices this redundancy?!

Meanwhile, what significant developments have occurred with the other characters? Aside from comic relationship drama, not much. Again, I am baffled. Glee boasts a broad array of characters including a goth girl, a girl who is not only one of a handful of black students in the school, but also overweight, a boy in a wheelchair, a morbidly obese girl, a boy with learning disabilities, a girl who had a baby and subsequently gave it up for adoption, and a girl with Down Syndrome. In a real school, these kids would struggle. A lot. And yet somehow, none of these kids are given any real issues to overcome. Have they all been dealt with off screen? It seems like the only issue that is ever taken seriously or examined in any way is being gay. There seems to be some reluctance to give weight to any other situation, or to suggest that maybe the struggles of all kids are valid and worth exploring. Why is this?

I get that it's the "issue of the moment".  Now, I am in no way saying gay kids don't have a hard row to hoe, because they do. My heart aches for them and the things they go through; things no kid should have to deal with. I, like most people, am horrified when young people feel the need to end their lives because of bullying related to their sexual orientation. It's not right, and it's not okay. What I am saying is that they aren't the only ones who have a rough go of things.  Most teen suicides aren't related to sexuality at all. Kids give up for any number of reasons; self-esteem issues, bullying because they are perceived as different or unattractive in some way, even clinical depression. In most cases, they were "born this way", didn't choose their circumstances, and can't control what's happening to them. They all feel hopeless and isolated. The difference is that special interest groups don't launch campaigns to save overweight kids. Celebrities don't line up to make videos for kids who are run-of-the-mill depressed. Or kids from ethnic minorities. Or kids with learning or developmental disabilities. But aren't they worth saving, too? Who will tell those kids that "It Gets Better"? Glee could. But the writers won't.

Santana's setup has intrigued me from the beginning. My impression of her has always been that this is a kid with crippling self-esteem issues. On the outside, she seems to have everything going for her: beauty, talent, wit, wealth (assuming her dad is actually a doctor), and popularity. Yet she is clearly unhappy. Something is missing--either in her life or in her heart, and she can't figure out how to fill the void. Hence the false bravado, the self-destructive behavior (drinking, promiscuity)--heck, even the boob job plays into this scenario. It never once occurred to me that she was gay, even with her involvement with Brittany. She likes Brittany because Brittany is completely non-judgmental and loves unconditionally. Since Santana doesn't love herself, she lets Brittany do it for her. It is certainly not unheard of for an emotionally vulnerable girl to become attached to another girl. I realize this is not a popular thing to suggest. I'm not denying that some people are legitimately gay, but when hormones and emotions come into play, confusion is not outside the realm of possibility. Brittany is sweet and nurturing, and that is like a salve to Santana's aching heart.

I expected (and hoped) that this would somehow parlay into an extended storyline about self-worth. Yes, there have been fleeting messages about this. But nothing deep or particularly meaningful. I envisioned that at some point, the other girls would figure out that Santana's feelings of inadequacy and self-loathing were to blame for her bad behavior. Maybe it wouldn't make much sense to them at first, because to these girls (who, if this was a remotely realistic school, would deal with a fair amount of grief of their own), it would appear that she has nothing to feel badly about.  But I bet Mercedes, Tina, Lauren, Rachel, and even Quinn must experience similar feelings, even though they are rarely shown and never leave any lasting effect. It would have been very moving to see these girls reach out to Santana and take her in to their care. We might have actually had the opportunity to find out exactly HOW the other girls gained the self-assurance they now have. With their varied backgrounds and life situations, I have to believe actual adversity and growth occurred at some point. I think of all the kids who could have been inspired by this story. All those kids who feel sad or empty or who hate themselves and have no idea why. Most kids probably relate to those feelings to some extent, but not all (or even most) of them can relate to being gay. But it seems like straight kids aren't allowed to have real, painful, crippling emotions. As if they should simply suck it up because they don't have to also deal with sexual identity issues. This story could have had almost universal appeal. But instead of taking the opportunity to explore these sensitive and potentially life-threatening feelings in a general way, once again the show goes with the idea that only those who struggle with their sexuality have a legitimate excuse for real emotion. I still hope that at some point, Santana realizes that her issues are bigger than her sexuality, and that her shredded self-esteem is at the root of her problem. It would be great to see her actually address those issues rather than having them miraculously resolved once she (I'm sure inevitably, now) gets together with Brittany. Much as I would like for her to figure out that she isn't actually gay, but rather seeking comfort from a safe, nurturing relationship, I realize such a development would cause a riot in the LGBT community and there's no way the show would risk offense. Now that they've launched that ship, I don't see how they can turn it around.

I know that every time a new "sexual orientation" scenario is introduced, the writers and actors get lots of reinforcement. These stories are written with care and purpose. They get praise from Ellen, Rosie, and Elton John. The media go crazy. I'm not saying this is a bad thing, or that the accolades are undeserved. The problem is that these are the ONLY stories that are written with care and purpose. As a result, these storylines have worked out very, very well for the show. And yes, they empower many kids and give them confidence to be who they are. But I don't understand why the writers feel the need to bolster the same group of kids over and over again. Kurt and his dad have softened hearts and opened eyes. Karofsky has given a voice to kids who continue to struggle and aren't sure how to proceed. Blaine is charming, affable, and (mostly) confident...the ideal role model. Doesn't it seem like the bases have been covered here?

I'm continually surprised by the tunnel vision exhibited by the writers. The ingredients to make a rich, well-rounded show are all here. Yet the writers seem content to make grilled cheese every night. There could be inspirational, meaningful stories galore for every single character. I sometimes wonder if any of these guys have ever actually talked to a teenager, or if they are working exclusively from their own recollections. Because if they had conversed with any teens of late, they would know that every kid struggles with something big. And every kid thinks his problems are way bigger than those of any other kid. Fear and loneliness and frustration aren't monopolized by a single group. These are universal, human feelings.  So why not spread the love? Maybe venture out and validate the struggles of kids who  don't get a lot of attention? Allowing each character the opportunity to work through legitimate trials does nothing to minimize the gravity of individual issues. Rather, these characters could learn from each other, gain empathy, and grow stronger together. Maybe seeing that played out on screen would boost a kid who feels homely, or who mixes up his letters, or has different beliefs than her peers.  Instead of forcing kids to grasp at straws and extrapolate inspiration from the mere presence of certain characters, why not give them something concrete and meaningful to cling to?

So, yeah, that's a lot.  I've been thinking about all this for a long time, and the past few weeks have sort of brought things to a head. The thing is, I love this show. Rather, I WANT to love this show. I did love it, now not so much. I keep trying to talk myself down, telling myself that it's *just* a show. But I don't really believe that. Because I see the good it does. It hurts and frustrates me when opportunities for even more good fall by the wayside. Adults are listening! Kids are listening! Take advantage of that power and say things that are worth saying! Respect independent thought. Cherish the individual. Inspire love of self and others. Don't play favorites--take the time to make EVERY story worthwhile. More lives will be touched, many may even be saved.

Dream Performances (according to me)


Maybe I'm imagining things, but it seems like lately the song selection on Glee has skewed toward more recent top 40 hits. This is not all bad: I really enjoyed the Glee versions of "Teenage Dream", "Hey Soul Sister", "Just the Way You Are", and some of the others. "Tik-Tok"and "Blame it on the Alcohol"? Mmmm--not so much.

Now, I'm the first to admit I could stand to broaden my horizons a little.  In the past several episodes, most of the songs were completely new to me. Yes, even the Bieber stuff. Shocking, I know. I guess I'm not exactly up to date. I'm aware of what's popular. I'm just not that interested. That said, I have a hard time getting excited about covers of songs that are already played to death on the radio, especially when there is pretty much a limitless supply of wonderful music.

So, the other night while I was waiting for my boys to finish their scout meeting, I was thinking about songs I'd love to hear performed on the show. For some of them, I have an idea about who I would like to have sing them. The rest just make me happy. :)

"Maneater" by Hall and Oates--how has this one not been done already?! It's like Santana's theme song.

"Teenager in Love" by Dion and the Belmonts--I think it would be adorable if Mike sang this.

"Bye Bye Love" by The Everly Brothers--also cute for Mike, but I think it would also work for Sam.

"Respect" or "Chains of Love" by Erasure--when I was a teenager, Erasure was standard at ALL dances...it's just fun, feel-good music. I love all of their stuff, but I think these would make great group numbers.

"Freedom" or "Wake Me Up Before You Go Go" by Wham!--if you can't tell, I'm a huge fan of cheesy 80s music. It makes me very happy. Blaine channels that "happy" vibe like no one else. Blaine + cheesy 80s music=VERY happy me. :)

"Unforgettable" by Natalie and Nat King Cole--definitely on par with "Happy Days/Get Happy".

"Eye of the Tiger" by Survivor--again, how has this one not been done?

"At Last" by Etta James--I desperately need Kurt to sing this once he gets his boy issues sorted out. His lower register is so gorgeous and I'd love for him to get a jazzy, meaty ballad that he can really sink his teeth into. I think he would also kill "Stormy Weather", "Someone to Watch Over Me", or "Can't Help Loving that Man of Mine".

"Girls Just Wanna Have Fun" by Cindi Lauper. How cute would this be?

"Everybody Wants to Rule the World" by Tears for Fears--another dynamite group number.

"In Your Eyes" by Peter Gabriel--Puck could use this one to make restitution for the "Fat Bottom Girls" debacle. Bonus points if he manages to scrounge up a boom box.

"Forever Young" by Alphaville--please, PLEASE let this be the last song of the series. I think this is my favorite song ever; the great, iconic song of my youth. It's the quintessential last dance.

Obviously, this is not a comprehensive list. It barely scratches the surface, actually. I didn't even get to The Cars, Whitney Houston, Jerry Lee Lewis, Elvis, Poison, Chicago, The Carpenters...not to mention the showtunes! The mind truly boggles...

 So, what songs are you dying to see covered on Glee?


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